Charades
by ficdirectory
Summary: The problem with Charades is that Garcia always picks the most obscure movies for the other team to act out. **Nominated: Best Team Fic in the 2011 Criminal Minds Favorite Fic Awards at LiveJournal**


JJ is good and frustrated watching Garcia celebrate with Seaver, Elle, Spencer and Morgan about another point they won in the damn Charades tournament. It was rigged if you asked her, but of course, no one did. Herself, Hotch, Rossi, Jordan and Emily were losing by a pathetic margin after drawing out slip after slip of paper from Garcia's turban, with long, obscure titles. Watching Hotch act out _The Mother and the Whore_ had been excruciating and more than a little weird, as he shimmied and mimed taking money and stowing it in places he didn't actually possess.

Her own team, not knowing Garcia's penchant for cheating, had filled Jordan's handbag with simpler titles: _Hide and Seek_, _LOST_, _The Cat in the Hat_. Spencer was guessing right constantly, and he was arguably the one with the least amount of knowledge when it came to popular culture.

She exhales, watching Seaver act out _The Secret Life of Bees _with skill and humor. Elle surprised them all and guessed it while Seaver was still in the midst of acting out the first word. Before that, Morgan had gotten _Rocky_ - and Elle called out the answer shrilly in about half a second.

Sighing, JJ drew a piece of paper from the turban. She stared at the title and rolled her eyes. The line below it gave the title away as a book, but usually their team ended up making their way to Garcia and asking what was what.

"Book!" Emily called out. "Three words! Second word!"

They were great at this part.

JJ held her thumb and finger an inch apart, in a universal gesture for the word small, hoping they would get it.

"Little!" Jordan exclaimed, jumping up. She was determined to make up their million-point deficit.

JJ mimed for them to keep trying.

"Small," Rossi called out calmly, and JJ nodded.

Maybe they would actually win this round. JJ wasn't holding her breath, but her competitive spirit wouldn't let her give up.

"Oh! _All the Small Things_!" Jordan screamed.

"That's a song title," Hotch pointed out. "This is a book…"

Jordan let out a frustrated groan. JJ surveyed her team and tried to figured out how the hell to put across the first or third words.

She held up three fingers, indicating the third word. She cupped her hand around her ear to signify "sounds like." Then, she pointed to her own shoes.

"Pumps!" Emily shouted. "It sounds like pumps! Okay… so…something…small…lumps?" she guessed.

JJ shook her head hard, and then Jordan guessed "heels" and their time ran out. "Ladies, you're thinking too hard! Shoes! It sounds like 'shoes…'"

"What was it?" Rossi asked.

"Fabulous Small Jews?" JJ says, quoting the title like a question.

Garcia, Seaver, Elle, Spencer and Morgan are across the room laughing like crazy.

"God damn it!" Jordan exclaimed. "What the hell kind of a book is that? Garcia, give me my handbag, okay? We gotta redo these titles…"

"Nope," Garcia answered, trying to catch her breath. "It's not our fault you're not schooled in the art of obscurity. All the titles are totally legit. Ask anyone."

It was Spencer's turn and he easily acted out _Star Trek: Deep Space Nine_, which Garcia, the little cheat got right no problem.

Finally, it was Emily's turn. She was their team's last hope to get something right.

"If you guys don't get this right, I'll kill you," Emily promised evenly, before she even put her hand in the turban.

JJ leaned forward on the couch, clutching a pillow shaped like a window with a face looking out. Pillow People used to be all the rage when she was growing up. But no. She couldn't think about that right now. JJ needed to focus this time. She had to get it. She watched Emily take a few seconds to absorb the title. When she started to take her turn, JJ was ready to pounce.

"Movie! Six words! Sixth word!" Jordan yelled, like she was at a football game.

Boldly, Emily rolled up her pants leg past the knee. On her thigh, there was a tiny tattoo of a heart.

"Tattoo! Oh my God! _The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo_!" JJ whooped. She slapped high fives with Hotch and Rossi, and helped Em right her pants leg. Jordan cheered like they had just won the Super Bowl.

"Not as clever as you thought, are you?" JJ couldn't help asking a little smugly.

"Well, I had to throw in an easy one…" Garcia smiled. "Thanks for being such good sports."

"Yeah, no problem," JJ replied, sitting down on the floor and dumping the remaining titles out on the floor. Emily joined her and they took turns unfolding papers and quoting the strange titles.

"_Confessions of a Pagan Nun_," JJ read. "Emily that is totally you."

"Thanks…" she replied, drawing her own slip and reading, "_Tales of the Gold Monkey_… Garcia, you watch way too much unknown stuff…"

"Oh, I don't _watch_ it," Garcia said, slicing cinnamon coffee cake. "I just look it up for fun and then save the really great ones for game nights…"

JJ couldn't help laughing. Silently, she read the remaining folded pieces of paper, while the voices of her coworkers, past and present, rose and fell around her:

_The Profound Desire of the Gods, You Can't Do That On Television, Berlin: Symphony of a Great City, __Coyotes I Have Known__, Don't Give Up The Sheep, James at 15, __After the Orgy__, The Knights of Prosperity, Manimal, _and, last but not least, _Living with Crazy Buttocks_.

"You know you're in for it now, though, don't you?" Emily asked rhetorically.

"What do you mean?" Garcia wondered innocently.

"Your secret's out. We know your strategy…" Emily smiled conspiratorially. "Just wait 'til next time…"

"I look forward to it," Garcia answered, her eyes bright with the challenge.


End file.
